To Be a COACH Who Makes a Difference
Making a Difference in Coaching, But How?
How do you feel right now?
Since my last blog post, what have you done for your goals in the coaching profession?
If you are choosing to be a coach that makes a difference, which will be the most suitable for your abilities, with which you can improve yourself, your job, and where you will be the inventor of strong questions and an explorer of awareness, feeling happy and successful both financially and spiritually, let today’s article you read open the door for you to make a difference on your coaching journey.
What do you want to achieve in the coaching profession?
Right now, what is the current situation?
Where do you see yourself in coaching sessions?
What is good about your sessions?
Do you notice what is missing and what is excessive when you are coaching?
Whatever you are thinking about investing in yourself today, you should also know that it will determine your own position of success in the coaching profession.
Can you be your coachee’s inner voice in coaching sessions?
During the session, it is very important for you to manage active and deep listening without looking for something from yourself about the subject your coachee has determined. If you can listen to your coachee’s troubles during a session without acquiring them or generating ideas in your mind, you are here and now.
Are you really here and now when you are reading this article?
In coaching, the things you have to pay attention to are deep listening and intuition. Many coaches have difficulties at this point, but for a coach who has the knowledge and skills of coaching with the gestalt approach, co-active coaching, and Transactional analysis, this stage is an area of great skill.
The Coach provides his coachee with strong questions so that he can listen to himself and use his intuition during the coaching session. The coachee has a situation that he/ she wants to resolve and achieve, or a matter that he wants to settle from the current situation. Determining the coachee’s expectations, evaluating his situation, being able to clarify and elaborate, then re-evaluating the situation with the awareness experienced, coming to the present moment by getting out of the past as well as determining the methods and strategies he can apply are directly related to the success of the coaching skills.
Actions to be taken after the options, plans, predictions, resources, and finalization… IS THAT ALL? NO. The most important achievement of coaching is the FOLLOW-UP PROCESS that will continue after the session.
Let’s talk about all this, along with what you need during the session to be a coach that makes a difference.
Dear colleague, the body is much wiser than you think, and it sure will give you signs if you can really listen to it. Feeling unwell and feeling as if something is not right, excitement about an issue or opportunity, the feeling of danger arising in places that should not be trespassed or touched…
How does the body react in such situations? If the voice inside you says you need to address that feeling about the related issue, you need to get your coachee to contact that feeling. If it has come to a point where you know something is right, you have to head in that direction.
Situations such as obsessing over the same thing, avoiding change, always sticking to the past, giving negative self-suggestion, trying to please everyone… etc. are difficult areas encountered in some stages of the sessions.
Our feelings and thoughts inside that restrain us, limit us, prevent us from moving forward, and with which we develop false beliefs sometimes come from outside, and sometimes from the voice within. Being able to identify the saboteur giving negative suggestions is highly important.
Our ego states, which are independent of how old we are now, form our behavioral patterns that vary according to our life roles and determine our communication style, attitude, and behaviors. We have experiences from our past that form the inner triggers in the emotional and operational sphere.
What would our solutions be if it weren’t for the mental saboteur we created inside us?
There are so many issues where we feed ourselves on excuses, don’t take action, delay our decisions, or most of the time, give up.
What excuses do you feed yourself?
What is the illusion you have created with your own thoughts?
It gives you great power to be able to evaluate the issue with multiple perspectives before making the things you go through your reality. It is your coaching skills with the gestalt approach that will give you this power.
What are you going through with the events you experience?
What is holding back from living the life you want?
How does the saboteur affect you?
Where would you like to start first to change the life that you have made for yourself and that you were convinced you would be happy with but now is making you unhappy?
As a coach who has coaching knowledge with transactional analysis and gestalt approach, where you look at yourself and your coachee will be deeper, more real, and much closer. Where are you looking at yourself and your life from at this moment?
How can you approach the opportunities that are waiting for you to go to them?
In one session my coachee said, “I don’t know what is important to me anymore. You should have seen the expression on his face when he said, “I am so overwhelmed by the injustice and ego conflicts in my workplace that I literally suffer on my way to work every day”, his posture, how he used his hands and arms with a passionate expression.
He was at a point where he felt helpless with a victim mentality and was waiting for a savior with his regretful decisions, the events caused by himself or his environment, and his perspective on the situations he experienced.
In the following stages of our coaching session, I once again realized how valuable the gestalt approach and Transactional analysis teachings are. Powerful coaching tools and powerful questions that raise awareness focused on solving key problems, enabled me to help the coachee find the right way without any guidance, towards where to look and what to improve in order to recenter his life.
Through these questions of awareness I mentioned, you find a way for the coachee to become clear about the direction he will head with his indecision. You reach the mastery that enables the coachee to give clear answers to all of his questions by making him aware of his own inner reasons, opening doors with questions to find answers that he can find solutions to in matters where he is blocked in the flow of life and unable to find the way out.
You enable the coachee to focus on the limitations in his mind and bring solutions to them with his emotions, which he alone cannot realize. The coachee easily answers the questions necessary for his progress, handles the questions and problems he has not been able to solve for a long time in all areas of his life, and provides solutions with GESTALT AND TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS.
It makes him realize what he has to transform and leave behind in order to move forward. Being here and now, the COACH makes it easier for the coachee to find out what values should be addressed first in order to find a solution and to progress easily in the coaching session.
What are the internal and external influences on his current state?
Where does the road go?
What is the point of arrival?
And what will that point make you experience?
What are the positive and negative sides?
What decisions do you need to make to change your life?
Please stop judging yourself, SABOTEUR!
CLARIFICATION, INTEGRATION, and COMPLETION…
Which side of you should you make peace within yourself?
Do you want to clearly determine what you want?
Which of the alternative strategies allows you to move forward?
WHAT DOES YOUR DESTINATION LOOK LIKE?
FEELING WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO YOU… do your feelings and thoughts belong to you?
What do you have that is transferred from others?
As one process ends, another begins. So, what factors can affect the process? What are the ethics, what are your values?
What do you need to control?
Who are the people you need approval from?
Would you want to listen to your inner voice when you ask “How Will I Talk?“
How does your inner voice make a decision?
What kind of step do you plan on taking?
What do you say you really need?
To be a coach that makes a difference, the coaching approach with Transactional analysis tells you that everyone is a parent, adult, and child. In a healthy individual, all three exist with the individual. We arrived at a very enjoyable point and continued our coaching session from here with my client, who picked up his sentences saying, “The excess from the past and the lack regarding the future…”.
Don’t look for something from yourself and silence your mind instead; listen deeply, don’t acquire other people’s troubles and stories. If you are whole and complete right now, you can merely read without thinking about anything else.
What are your answers to the question of how to be a coach that makes a difference and what are the steps you aim for?
What can you do after this blog post you are reading?
What have you not done so far? What issues do you undermine yourself in your coaching profession?
On which matters do you allow inhibitions?
Regardless, what are your strengths in the coaching profession?
What is the issue you want to discuss with me?
When will you actualize it?
How eager and excited are you for this?
Can you send me a memo?
List the things that make you proud of yourself as well as your expectations from your coaching career.
With his analysis, decisions, and action steps of his determination, the cochee, with whom we have completed our coaching session, quit his current job after all the processes we went through together and currently has his own job that he loves.
He continues his process of change and transformation with pleasure and determination. Following the illusion from which he woke up stronger with the lessons life had taught him; he builds his career for the point he wants to reach, where he will be happy to be living.
To be a COACH WHO MAKES A DIFFERENCE, YOU are the one who decides to make a difference.